Surrender

She is awake. One of those nights when, after falling asleep, her brain decides that she needs to rehash everything. She stays under the covers, willing herself to go back to sleep, refusing to look at the clock. But the nagging is insistent: What can she do to help this couple who trusts her to put the mess to rights? It’s her job, putting lives back together so they can move forward in faith. Sometimes, though, her hands are tied, and she feels the weight of saying, “Sorry, I have done all I can.”

Her morning prayer, beginning with thanksgiving, quickly turns into tears of anguish. “Help me find a way, Lord. Help me help them.” There is no answer, and she weeps for this couple and for herself. If only God would show her a way, send her an answer. There is only quiet.

Sitting in the silence, she finally decides to release it all. “Into your hands, Lord, I surrender this burden. Take it from me, for I can do nothing more. This couple deserves Your best. I leave it with You.”

As the day wears on she feels a growing peace. Her heart is quiet, her soul is comforted. She sleeps.

A voicemail the next day brings her once again to tears. The couple isn’t giving up, they aren’t turning away. Despite the frustration and the months of working toward a solution, they have decided to press on in a new direction. Her tears now are tears of joy; in her surrender, they found new hope. The Lord answered her prayer. Her soul sings with the remembered truth – it was never about her; it was and is always about the Lord and His great mercy and love.